Observer desperate to stop Johnson

N Cohen of the Observer seems increasingly furious as things don't go his way. Having slagged off the left for backtracking on identity politics, he has discovered the right are even worse. Johnson seems to be in the lead for Tory Leader. Time for the very best in sharp analysis:

Javid, Hunt and Gove have their defence ready. How can you accuse us of lying to the Tory party, country, maybe even ourselves? We are as nothing (step to the right and point) when compared to the greatest charlatan in the history of the Conservative party: that incompetent, manipulative, lazy, overentitled, media-constructed and media-protected fatberg of dishonesty

Raab is little better though:

[a] home counties Mussolini. To get his Brexit deal, which, naturally, is no deal, Raab would mount a coup d’etat [the Remainers started that,with the assistance of the Speaker] and order the Queen to suspend parliament. Once power was his, he would cut taxes on what wealth we still possessed so deeply it’s hard to see how our underfunded public services could function.

Cohen backs the EU tough guys as ever:

Supporters of a no-deal Brexit talk as if they have a brutal but honest programme. They neglect to mention the cost or to say that, if we crash out – either by design or because the EU gives up on us – the EU will insist, when and if we return for a trade treaty, that Britain accepts the terms of the withdrawal agreement.

It all ends with one of the oddest arguments ever for a PVCV:

If I were them, I would be desperate to get democratic consent rather than bear sole responsibility for the stinking reviews their turkey of a show so richly deserves.

Meanwhile, the Observer's  Political Editor finds some dark artery:

Johnson’s previous tilt at the top job in 2016, brought to a disastrous end by Michael Gove’s decision to run against him, was marked by chaos and calamity....His time as foreign secretary was punctuated by gaffes and saw him largely written off as a future prime minister...[Yet]...he has done what some thought impossible, conducting a disciplined, strategic and (so far) relatively error-free campaign that has seen him build more support among MPs than any other candidate.

What lies behind this resurrection? Craft and guile:

a campaign that had been long in the planning, with a larger and more cohesive team and a candidate willing to follow orders and put in the hours...He also speaks to Lynton Crosby, the political strategist who masterminded his London mayoral wins [and organised May's disastrous election campaign in 2017]...parliamentary expertise has been drafted in....Gavin Williamson’s sacking as defence secretary by May also meant there was a former chief whip on the market....Johnson’s special adviser Lee Cain has been charged with the unenviable task of limiting his boss’s newsworthy outbursts and has recently been given reinforcements....

Mastermind Grant Shapps read the biography of Lyndon Johnson (his unconscious was obviously at work) and then planned a campaign using -- oh no!-- a spreadsheet :

From the backbenches, Shapps decided to test his skills – building a spreadsheet of MPs and attempting to predict how each would vote in the no-confidence motions and meaningful Brexit votes. His results were close to the mark...He then used the same system to map the leadership election... his data has been used to put MPs in different groups, with “pivot tables” [dastardly!] used to show what kind of campaigning each should be subjected to – and which are a lost cause.

There is appalliongly insincere upper-class Etonianism:

Few have been safe from the Johnson charm offensive...[Another MP, Clarke] ...said he was approached by Johnson at the end of last year. “He is someone who doesn’t treat you as if he is the big cheese and we’re the bloody infantry,” he said. “It was very much a two-way conversation. He was interested in marginal seats in the north that voted Leave – and how to keep those seats and win others like it.[Sounds like the old 'Dad's back!' management strategy the nobs are so good at]...But actually, what we saw was, yes, a bit of humour. But there was also some gravitas there. It was a relief.”

It might not be that difficult to work out what has been going on though:

“the situation is so stark,” said Clarke. “People recognise that this is an existential challenge for the Conservative party. All the available polling evidence suggests there is one person with the policies and personal skills to connect to the voters that we have temporarily been sundered from. It’s not a difficult sell to colleagues. People recognise that things have not worked.”

Of course, any journalist using common sense can see that it is all in vain:

the elephant in the room of this leadership election [is] – the Johnson Brexit policy. He has vowed to Leave, with or without a deal, at the end of October. Yet even MPs backing him already accept that parliament will use all means available to stop him....[short of one of Cohen's coups I hope?] ...One cabinet minister pointed out that not only would parliament stop a no-deal in October, but that the changing of the European commission over the summer would mean Johnson would have no one to agree a new deal with. “There will be no one in Brussels,” [So who's running the show then? That question is long overdue]